holy shit, was the last time i submitted a journal seriously july of last year? lmao.
guess i really don't pay attention to much around here anymore. while cleaning out my gallery/storage i had the chance to read some older comments left by you guys...some of you were close friends, some are still close friends...some of you are no longer with us.

but it's kinda cool seeing this virtual memory, ya know? scrap that, the letters and phrases might be stored digitally, the memory is very real. good times, good times.
anyways...a lotta shit happened over summer, and i lost someone extremely close to me.
it's a feeling that's hard to describe...and i've never felt more depressed in my life...during the first month, my weight dropped an average of 5 pounds a week. BUT...i've learned to live on. i've learned that life will always be tragic if you refuse to see it any other way, and no matter how i mope and brood nothing will change if i don't do anything to change it.
more importantly, i realized how busy i've been. i was always preoccupied with the next moment before it happened. i'm the kinda person that can't really enjoy anything good because i always dread its end from the beginning. that part of me has to be changed. painting helps, so does ps3 and maybe a lil booze and nicotine...well, enough of me babbling about utter shit that probably none of you care about, lol.
i've got way too many projects going on simultaneously (personal projects) to squeeze in between work and my other obligations...but i'm trying my best to pace myself and get stuff done. i think i've changed my painting style a lot since i started painting (for those of you that bothered to follow my stuff for that long, or even remember)...but i'm liking the change, hope you like it as much as i do. thanks for the continual support, guys...even though i'm basically non-existent when it comes to responding to comments. i usually get to read your comments like 2 days after they've been posted and i get lazy...sorry about that.
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"Our life is God's gift to us. What we do with that life, is our gift to God." Eleanor Roosevelt
How are you doing?
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. Love me .
*shrug* I hope that I finally can. I figured there was no hurt in asking.
send me a note to work out the details
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if i don't let myself be happy now... then when?
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